She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
I just found out my boyfriend is cheating on me, please tell me Carl is a unisex name.
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
my new ipod has external speakers and a video camera...all i can think about is how much more convenient it would be for me to make a pretty decent sex tape
I just won unlimited hot dogs for life. I'm so glad I smoked
Sorry I pulled the thermostat off the wall..
Drunkasaurus has found a new cave to eat all the children she captured
I need to get you away from Bacardi 151 and out from under the bed
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
I AM OFFERING YOU ALCOHOL AND THE CHANCE TO LET ME SAY FUCK IT TO MY RESPONSIBILITIES. HOW MANY TIMES DOES THIS HAPPEN?!
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
Gross! What the hell is that?!?
It's quite clearly a man posing erotically with multiple packages of bacon.
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
Randomize
