So how come you never look me in the eyes anymore when we make love?
New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
I got an 8 ball and a free entrance pass to the strip club, if i dont get laid tonight I never will.
what's with the bloody hand print on the hood of your car
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Her voice kills me. Its the perfect pitch to fuck with my hangover.
Okay. But I hope it isn't expensive lingerie. Because I'm ripping it off Hulk Hogan style.
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
There is a reason for guards on beard trimmers I just clipped a wrinkle on my sack so much blood
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My arrest report says I was found in midtown "performing lewd and lascivious acts on top of art meant for public display and enjoyment".
I'm putting my hangover kit in my car for the trip to work tomorrow morning. Dedication
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
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