so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
He played with my vagina like it was a turntable
i dedicated my morning wood to you.
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I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
I shit you not ... they just advertised a recruiting service for strippers at this concert.
drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite
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No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
Pretty good. Thinking about getting day drunk and filling out job applications so I don't hate myself as much
You would be successful and sober without me. you can't turn your bakon me now
One day when i undoubtedly need an intervention please let it include lightsabers.
I think I can handle that.
We finally gave up searching because everything had started to look like flip flops
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
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