I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
sorry for the naked aussie man in your room last night, he got lost on his way to the bathroom
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
It's Ash Wednesday.
If you really think that not eating meat on a weeknight is going to keep you out of hell, fine. Can I use that chimichurri you made?
Also, there's the possibility of falling 5 feet to your death to make it more exciting
In which case I will yell FIVE SECOND RULE and continue to slam you
I woke up to my roommate checking my pulse
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
I was drunk, he was taking a bodyshot while avoiding my piercing. I told him I loved him. He waited until I woke up with my hangover to say he loved me too. It was hangover magic.
So I spent all night thinking my bed was floating down a river and telling the cats to get on the bed because they were going to float away. Percocet is strong shit.
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
I manage to fit my wine bottle in my koozie and the rest is history
If my emotions are below a 3 or above a 7, I'm crying
So I just got motorboated by my grandma…