thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
Once you realized you couldn't finish the 30 you started walking down the street and leaving a beer in everyone's mailbox
Sometimes I seriously wonder if I could get away with vodka Sundays at work. Cuz this red bull feels naked.
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
I should have considered my snorting capabilities before breaking my nose
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
Dedication to a hook up: I had to recruit five people at the train station to help me buy a ticket from a kiosk and get on the right train in 15 minutes because I discovered that my car was stolen.
Yeah except my drinking partners aka my parents went to sleep Cuz ya know, they're old.
On the way home there was a guy passed out IN the road on Colfax with his pants around his ankles, completely bare assed. If he was dressed as a speed bump, he succeeded.
Dude get here. I just re-invented nachos. For real though. They werent real before right now
He said it wasn't ladylike of me to drink more whiskey than him. I told him to stop being a little bitch.
I would rather her be sleeping with someone new than getting to go Harry Potter world before me...
Well, we all woke up in drag with no memory of why we were in drag. On the plus side, this shade of lipstick looks really good on me.
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
Heeyy... sorry I got so drunk. You probably don't ever want to see me again. Thank you for dealing with me when I tried to jump over the deli counter for some mayonnaise.
Randomize
