I wish I could punch you in the face.
I want to touch your soul through your body...with my penis...
Mike i'm at church right now...
Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
That's some primal shit right there. My vagina is all like CONSUME HIM AND HIS FRUIT HE WILL GIVE YOU SONS!
We can stop fighting if you send me a picture of your dick standing at full attention wearing a sock.
I'll wait.
It can also be a hat.
I'm eating tortillas right now. Like not cooked tortillas. Someone is playing the guitar. Man with bandana.
He left stubble rash on my thighs and cooked me bacon before 9am. I need to lock this down STAT
You told me I got kicked out of the bar for lipping off to the bouncers... what shocked me the most was that I made it to the bar
You’re a genius! I just walked in, shut the door, blew him and left. He could barely move afterwards and was a hot mess at the presentation. He already sent me a calendar invite for another meeting
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
Randomize
