i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
His text read: Sex? I replied: Not drunk enough. He bought 4 more rounds and tantalized me with the offer pizza later. This could be the beginning of a beautiful relationship.
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
dude, boobs are like the porridge in goldylocks
The dingo escaped by eating a hole through my screen door. It's loose in the city somewhere.
His mom always writes on my facebook right after we have sex. it's like she knows. with her scary mom psychic powers
Tomorrow, you will get a text, and it will bE spelled right, that's me yo, certify ya soon
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
I'm really proud of my unchallenged ability to convert boob guys into ass men
THEY'RE TEXTING LIKE MIDDLE AGED SOCCER MOMS WHAT DO I DO
I'm one bad relationship away from owning seven cats.
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
Randomize
