Stop. You don't mean that. Tequila might mean that. But you don't mean that.
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
I am too drunk to make real decisions. I had pop rocks all over my ass earlier. This is not a joke.
We need to pull ourselves out of this slump. We need dick and lots of it. We are going to fuck our way to happiness.
It's a hurricane, not a zombie apocalypse. WHY DID YOU BUY SHOTGUNS?!?!
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
Pretend you're in a taco. That always helps me sleep.
Tried to put an eye patch on while hooking up with a girl. She was not amused.
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
I made out with a 40 year old and told her we were dating then got kicked out of a gay bar. This is the day I stop drinking.
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
all i remember is walking home without my pants on... when i woke up i was sleeping in between my parents in their bed, no more whiskey wednesdays
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