He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
How was I supposed to know she would get offended when I asked her how long it took to draw on her eyebrows.
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
just took a shot of real whiskey... i forgot what it's like to drink liquor that costs more than twelve dollars.
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
I just finished deleting miscellaneous contacts from my phone ... time for a HIV test!
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
I don't know how or when he is sober long enough to donate plasma
Whoever put salsa in the kiddie pool.....your an ass. Fuck you.
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
I should buy myself lingerie for Valentine’s Day instead of a present for you because I am the present
The gyno waiting room is so strange because the pregnant woman next to me is making a PowerPoint of her pregnant photo shoot with her husband and I’m sitting here trying to figure out from Instagram who I had sex with on Sunday lol
Randomize
