he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
I didnt realize we were having a competition in poor decision making skills
how else could I explain the last few years
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawn mower thinking of you
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
But Alex is drunk in Philly and I told him to come see me so that's "first-love,-drunk,-high,-and-it's-a-snow-day-hook-up-with-an-ex" points. 69
No she left bc the of pic I have of my mom in my bathroom. She thought it was my gf
Why the hell do you have a picture of YOUR MOM in your bathroom?!?!
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
Yo. What's your name again? You put "don't tell your landlord" as your name lol
just yelled CURVEBALL at my nightie because it turned out to be a pair of shorts
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
Basically, I am an endless fountain of unconvential sexual experiences and knowledge.
Randomize
