And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
I ordered a VEGAN pizza, because it gets here the fastest, just so I could get a 2 litre of Coke. For my whiskey.
I think the guy I was trying to dance with was an undercover cop...
Never thought going to McDonald's alone at 3 AM would end with a blowjob outside some random girl's apartment...
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
They're the one who can profit the most when given the opportunity for blackmail.
At least that's how I've always seen it whenever I've been the Designated Driver.
That simultaneously explains everything and makes me very very terrified of you.
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
My mom just woke me up with a cowboy hat and sunglasses on. It's 7 am and she's drunk.
Randomize
