john hughes is dead. crushing any and all dreams of me ever being in an 80's john hughes film. bummer.
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
No one knows who he is but he hasn't missed a shot in beer pong yet. He's dressed as lance armstrong and is tearing shit up.
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
I can't keep up with all the guys you're banging. I'm just going to start referring to them by city of origin.
I have a bruise on dick where you tried to "high five" me.
You played Frank Sinatra today after we had sex. You moved way up in my literal book of men. Congrats.
Hungover playing piano at a baptism I am the PICTURE of class I feel like I should be struck by lightning
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
If I stopped drinking I'd have to take up murdering.
What are best friends for?
Picking your clothes up from a one night stand you had nearly 2 months ago
idk but im stoned n hiding in the bathroom from my kids with a really big bowl of really little candy bars
Randomize
