So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
Did we both pass out talking about cake last night?
You leave a trail of fuck everywhere you go
So i wrote 'don't sex me' on my stomach, so that if we got to a point where my shirt is off - he would know how i really feel, not just the alcohol talking
how did that work out?
Well, all the water washed it off, so we ended up fucking since i didn't have my reminder...
The instructions say refer to specific course material, but I'm in no mood to reopen this awful book that caused me so many lost hours of drinking.
Yeah FUCK THAT NOISE
Who would've thought that Monopoly night would've ended with some girl peeing on the couch.
Why do you have an empty bottle of port in your bathroom bin?
He got a new tattoo in prison. It's actually a good tattoo, making it that much harder for me to hold out until he's off house arrest.
I never thought I would be saying these words but...when did David Spade get hot?
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
Your mom has reinvented the use of a ping pong ball.
I just took like 30 condoms from the doctors office... no one can say I don't try to save my money.
I gave him a hand job in the parking lot... now he thinks we're meant for each other...
I guess I called her at 2am, demanding that she bring us food. She told us to order pizza, and I yelled "DON'T MENTION PIZZA!" I recall nothing.
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
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