How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
her roommates boyfriend drunkenly walked in on us banging and said yeeeeaaaaaahhhh and tried to high five me
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume
All hell broke loose. When the police showed up, this kid somehow haggled with a cop to let him pee in public. I'm convinced he could talk the panties off of a nun
Dude they're making a condom for people who have no feeling in their penises that will make them able to have an orgasm. I love science
For sure. I'm slow cooking a 6 pound pork shoulder wrapped in bacon. If that doesn't scream "guys I'm going into culinary arts lets get drunk" I'm not sure what does.
The bartender had to walk me home last night. New high or new low?
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
I couldn't really understand you because you were really quiet and I said "I don't know what you're saying, it's kind of a big mumble" and you said "that sums up my life"
Her new crush is a 6'2" guacamole baron that may also be a Jedi.
Do the security cameras outside your house capture sound? If so your whole family is going to hear me describe my threesome
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