I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
he looked like jesus. just the kind of jesus i would have sex with.
Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
I'm passing your future prison.
I just ran from Santa Claus in Kroger
just took my temp. 103. i wonder how tylenol and jager bombs are gonna mix
Just made a coke joke and literally drooled on myself. How do we feel about pavlov's theory of conditioning now?
you sat up and said "i'm the worst kind of roommate, the drunk kind"
Apperanlty I was screaming "It's hard to swim with a broken ankle sir" and then tackled the lifeguard. The joys of blackouts
He was dressed up as Jesus and had vodka in one hand while he was blessing everyone and splashing them with holy water in the bathroom.
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
Stoner thoughts are the only thoughts I want to have now.
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
Randomize
