OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
our cab driver is having phone sex.
I replied to the university automated mass text about the armed robbery at the on-campus Starbucks with a sad face. Basically sums up my night.
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
bleeding from the face, sitting in a shopping cart and holding a wad of ripped caution tape. what else would i be doing?
Did you get my bra back of the bartender?
I seriously think we need to revision your idea of 'keeping a low profile'
It's like....nice talking about real estate but your son gave me herpes
I woke up at 4 am to my roomate peeing all over my clean laundry. He thought he was in the bathroom and yelled at me for being in the bathroom with him while he was peeing.
I hope your perfect outfit is a slutty power rangers outfit. That's been my dream wedding since I was a kid.
21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
Just made a Xanax and ginger ale smoothie. Oh Thursday you are good to me..
I started blowing him in North Dakota, and I finished the job in Minnesota. Oh, the places road head can take you.
I told the person I was on the phone with to hold on while I looked for my phone. I think it's time to stop doing dabs.
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
Eating breakfast at 1:30 in the afternoon stark naked is how everyone should live