So I got my period. Finally. In related news, I reinstated my belief in God.
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
Until last night, I had never actually thrown up ON a sandwich
10 Things Your Gyno Wants You To Stop Doing To Your Vagina
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
Why is there a frozen condom filled with water in my freezer?
why are all my papers due the day after my potential hangover
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
No but the chipped one is crooked now. Clearly I didn't use my hands to break my fall. I used my face
For Some Reason, Boys Are Singing The ‘Halo’ Theme Song In School Bathrooms
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
I know you're gay. But if I'm not getting dick, then you have to. That's what friends do.
how come you came home with "Amanda owns this" written on your forhead
He sang a ten minute song about me sitting on his face and eating quesadillas. Pretty sure I have to marry him.
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
Date with Air Force guy was nice btw. And for my next trick I'll talk him into fucking me in his fighter jet at 30,000 ft.
Randomize
