Assholes at mcdonalds drive through wouldn't serve us last night even though we said we were on small motorcycles that were to small for them to see and weren't heavy enough for the sensors. We made noises and everything.
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
honestly, i'm just crying in the kitchen naked and eating salsa
Aaaand I cut your bangs with a large knife last night ...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
Why am I getting texts saying are you ready for this butthole? Help
He showed me a picture of his baby hamsters and I called them "Mammal McNuggets"
I think I'm going to add the date I dumped his sorry ass as a life event on FB.
I think that's justified.
But yesterday I literally met half his family buzzed wearing a cheeta print bathing suit super short shorts and a tiny tank top.. I was like awesome
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
I never thought my selfie stick would come in handy for nudes.
He's going to wonder why I have burn marks on my asshole
Bitch are you kidding? 2016 is gonna be the year our pussies run for president
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
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