I can't find my pants or my car
I didn't even hookup I think I took them off at taco bell...
ha omg I always lose my dignity at taco bell as well... so no big deal.
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
he pretended not to hear me say our safety word. how do you think I feel?
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
Drinking heavily at 3pm and about to rescue a 30lb street turtle. Dont even bother attempting to rise to this level bitch
It doesn't matter how many beers you've had, it's unacceptable to piss in someone's helmet after a playoff win.
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
I found us a new booze connection and I'm writing college admissions essays. The future is bright.
You know that girl that climbed through my window and got in my bed with me and fucked me? It turns out she was real and has a real boyfriend who is real pissed
Taco Bell is giving high school kids free tacos STEAL YOUR BROTHER'S WALLET I'LL BRING THE WEED.
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
I feel like the dump I just dropped is the most successful thing I've done so far today.
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
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