This old guy in denny's is sitting alone and he is looking at us and laughing for no reason
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
His friends call him "Gasm".... Im going for it.
My room should be renamed "Land of the Misfit Condoms."
Whoever decided putting Tom Seizmore and Heidi Fleiss together in rehab should win some kind of award.
She literally called herself a shamefully bad decision. Of course I slept with her. Best bad decision ever
She's hidden vodka up her skirt and is riding a parking meter. Things can only get better
I just don't want to have to pretend at every family function she brings him to that he didn't hit on me first
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
Crashed the mayor's bday party, no list for some reason. Wore suits. Ludacris was there.
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
Oh. My. God. It is NOT okay to drink Johnny Walker when there is no Jameson. My skull is eating my brain.
Randomize
