I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
We pay for beer, you give birth. It's how the world works.
After a valiant attempt at golf, I think it's time for Tiger to go back to doing what he does best- having sex w/ blond, white women.
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
If I had really thought it through, I would have bought some Depends, popped one on and made this night my bitch.
Just woke up, shitty hungover, and realized that every article of clothing I slept in was backwards, bra included. Fuck you, gin. Fuck you.
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
THE CEO RESPONDED TO THE MEMO WITH HIS "UNICORN" EMAIL ADDRESS AND NOW HE'S APOLOGIZING TO EVERYONE FOR USING HIS PERSONAL EMAIL AT WORK.
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
we were clicking our heels together saying theres no place like home, while the cops were tellin us to call our parents and tell them what happened.
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
Randomize
