oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
Just got walked in on during safety inspections
Think you passed?
I'm terrified to sleep next to her. Of course the sex will be fuckng awesome.
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
Hurry there's a dancing lesbian. She's a jumper and has impeccable jazz hands.
Do you think she hates me because I thought her roommate's name actually was Butterface?
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
he's gonorrhea incarnate
I need to throw up and die. The order doesn't matter. I feel like shit
You're a waste of cheezeits
if you come you're not allowed to wear pants. if you arrive wearing pants you won't be wearing them long.
Why is it I can't go buy redbull and tylenol pm from a store without getting questions about my health choices?
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
You're even getting laid in my dreams, god I'm a good wingman
Randomize
