you know i'm gay cause i'd have sex with lady gaga. what straight man would say that?
I just hotboxed my laundry basket.
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
I guess she thought her walk of shame would be more dignified if she stole my dog
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
Literally best acid trip ever. Better than sex. At one point she looked over at me, started crying, holds up her hands and said "dinosaur tears of sadness". Craziest roommate ever.
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No matter how drunk I am or how drunk I'll ever be I love you
Did you take the full box of samoas or do I not remember getting baked and eating half a box by myself?
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
Tip: never mention Guy Fieri during sex
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
As your friend, I promise I will drink a full bottle of vodka and belly slide down the stairs with you if that test is positive
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