What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
last night i was so high that when a homeless person asked me for a dollar, i responded: dolla dolla bill ya'll.
how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
I'm amazed your boyfriend is still with you, how do you manage to pee on him while he is holding you in his lap?
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
I moved out... There's nothing left but his childhood trophies...
You should make him a new one, you know like "you suck at relationships but thanks for trying participation award"
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
I did cocaine off my boobs last night. Then I wrote two essays and went on a run. Go me
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
being broke is really keeping my alcoholism in check
I think i got beer on your cat.
Randomize
