ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
I will come over now to take full advantage of you in your vulnerable state.
Fine. I should warn you I just threw up in danas fish tank. Fish are dead. Livers dead. I smell and look like a dead animal. And not showering. So deal with it.
I got shot at today. If that doesn't get me at least a blow job I give up working on the south side
Maybe if more guys knew my pillowtalk occasionally includes me scribbling notebook diagrams of cell signalling pathways, I'd get laid more often
Currently behind the bar at some asian place, pouring drinks for everyone with a snake around my neck
The best part about passing out on the floor was the fact that when I pissed myself, I didn't piss the bed again.
My neck is PURPLE. This is NOT a good day to be indoctrinated by the cardinal...
Ugh. The fucking vaginal recession is so real right now.
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
i had a flashback to you roaring like a dying tiger and then throwing your wallet (maybe?) at the cat in the living room and saying "you're the only adult that lives here take all my money"
I'm not sure. I have to find the Greeks I was with last night and see if they can explain to me why I can't hear out of my right ear and why I look like I got the shit kicked out of me
I'm trying to cause a divorce, your hooking up with a felon, I think we need Jesus.
It’s the biggest dick I’ve ever seen. His IQ drops 25 points when he’s hard because there’s no blood going to his brain
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