It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
you called to congratulate me on being the reason you lost never have i ever
I have "you made mistakes last night" written alllll over me.
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
And I'm PMSing. So if I'm not crying, I'm masturbating.
Also I feel like 60% of our relationship is based on sausage mcmuffins.
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
Pretty sure he sprained my tongue. This is why you don't hook up with gingers.
Can we talk about how i am holding a tupperware container of my own puke in the back of my grandparents car while my sister drives
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
I'm getting married
To pizza
I just formed the "shit on a tree in Chicago club." And I feel awful about it.
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
I. Am. Not. Tattooing. My. Penis.
Randomize
