If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
I just remembered we said the Lord's Prayer before we went out last night.
bet u 5 dollars u can't guess were i woke up this morning
oh god.. jail?
better, on the catwalk of the auditorium
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
We asked "Is that Andy puking in the bushes, its 7 AM" he looks up and goes "It's okay guys, its 7:30"
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
styled my pubes into a mustache as a surprise. Thought you should know
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
I am so not sober enough to have a 5 minute conversation in Spanish
You have not lived until you've slid down a waterfall fucked out of your mind. Fact.
Babe, holding my hair while i blow you doesn't count as being romantic
I think the pizza guy was in shock..
Well I didn't mean to answer the door only in socks but I mean come on, 4 hours of sex works up an appetite! I WAS RAVENOUS
IT'S PERFEFT
... what?
HIS DICK. IT'S PERFECT. BYE.
Call me a snob but I'm not banging chicks with more fingers than teeth.
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