Do you know how hard it is to conceal the fact that you puked all over the bed that someone is sleeping in?
Hey! Thanks for asking, but it didnt go well. He threw up in the car on the way to dinner. Blind dates arent for everyone.
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
I just remembered our "im drunk enough to look at your vagina" conversation. Is that offer still valid? I really think I need a second opinion
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
I just realized how terrible that was... I was drumming on your penis to a song about Baby Jesus.
I was randomly pulled aside to have my bag checked. It had 50 condoms in it.
No we were too stoned to stop you from wiping the peanut butter all over the car.
you tried to strip tease your way into canada but got arrested instead. don't worry, your mom doesn't know.
the raccoons are back...
Randomize
