when I'm not with you everything just looks like crayon scribble
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
Sharon took in a random bleeding stranger drunker than her, named her Nicole, and is feeding her jello shots on the toilet
All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
there's a girl in the coffee shop just eating a pint of ben & jerry's
SMART GIRL
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
You stole my camera, took a picture of yourself and said "that's beautiful, just as beautiful as our waitress".
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
He said, "cum on daddy's dick!" ... I pictured my dad. That just scarred me for life.
My snow day: told Cam, "we're not dating today, we're just roommates." No bra, boxers, drinking whiskey by myself for the past 2 hours, yelling at The Ultimate Fighter reruns from 3 years ago.
I'm to the point of desperation where I stare at customers penis imprints through their pants all day
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
Randomize
