Writing a book: The Evolution of the Douche Bag: From Popped Collars to Ed Hardy Shirts. Doing research now.
Make sure you include chapters on white sunglasses, spray tans, and toxic amounts of hair gel.
All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
Ummm. I just wanna say this now: Don't let me invite the band back to the apartment to see my stripper pole.
they were having sex on the toilet apparently and everytime someone knocked they flushed. it was like an auditory scoreboard of sex duration.
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
Jesus when did you leave my house? I found 2 bottles of wine, vodka, and a book with blow all over it wondering if I was read bedtime stories
The stripper started talking about murdering people....that lapdance turned dark.....
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
Randomize
