Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
if this week's events in iraq have taught me anything, it's that when pulling out, always expect a mess...
I just spent my lunch hour driving around campus yelling "TRADE LIVES WITH ME!" to all the freshmen moving in
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
He was carrying a rolled up carpet saying he was saving it for tomorrow's Walk of Fame.
He puked, did more shots, and then pissed in a drawer. We thought it was bad enough and all of a sudden...boom-clothes come off and he passes out with slippers and a styrofoam hat on and a guitar hero guitar in hand pretending he was slash.
You had the genius idea to tape beer to the celing fan. There goes his security deposit. He is gonna be fuckin pissed.
Watching her eat just hurts me
Remember when you fed me goldfish while I was -inside- of someone?
So he says to my dad "I'll pull out of your daughter but I'm not going to apologize". Yea, my night was fun.
What exactly do I say to a random stoner hookup to thank him for ending my dry spell? Is it awkward to just say "Thanks for that. It was well needed."
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
Promise me you will not let me do anything sexual with or to a mini horse no matter how drunk we get. Ever.
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
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