Just got yelled at by a priest...again.
new number. flushed my phone last night when i puked, made B help me look for it for 2 hours.
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
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I have a date tonight... Like a real date... Not the kind where you just go over to his house and have sex and then never speak again.
i'm in that phase where i'll swallow anything except food
I'm worried my skin won't stretch enough to handle this boner. Then what?
Also I've decided that I'm buying the next friend of mine who is dumb enough to get married a live porcupine as a wedding present.
I paused the movie when the delivery guys arrived, and while they were assembling the bed, one of the guys pointed to the tv and said "why so serious?" And it made the whole experience happy.
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Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
I'm glad I didn't see Grandma stumbling drunk and peeing herself...it would be like seeing my future.
Went online to check my credit card... $147.87 at Waffle House. $632.36 at "Red Rose Gentleman's Club" and a $1000 cash advance from an ATM. I may no longer be a fiancé.
we're tipping the strippers with chocolate coins.
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