my vag is so smooth its legendary
I wish life was like dora the explorer where dancing pigs appear out of nowhere to solve your problems for you
so her cute freckles turned out to be blackheads
The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I attempted to stand up and was quickly reminded by gravity that I am the universe's bitch right now
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
How much more is Amanda Bynes going to rip out our hearts?!?!?
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
I'm convinced he's the patron saint of oral sex
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You have set the bar insurmountably high with apple pie and buttsex.
Just smoked the bong while taking a dump. I love living by myself.
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
He must've been a bear in a previous life. My nipple is bleeding. Shit's sensitive.
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
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