my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
I need to find my pants, a way out of here, and a cheeseburger.
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
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Woke up today to the sound of church bells. My first thought was shit the apocalypse, but then I remembered my hook up lives next to a church. This might be a rough day.
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
I don't know if it has occurred to you yet, but you are dating a nymphomaniac, and your work schedule is an interference of my needs being fulfilled. Get home now.
He put himself in the friend zone by calling me dude all night so I blew his friend. Judge me.
i ended up making out with my new neighbor in a stranger's car that we found unlocked on a driveway somewhere. apparently drunk self never say "no" to adventure.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
And at the semi-adult age of 25 I have shit my pants. Not even drunk, just really late to work. Is this real life?
The dominatrix coworker is currently listening to pop music that has been translated into an Irish dialect and sung by high school kids. Every day gets weirder here.
You peed all over his floor and had a bottle popped in your ass when you passed out. Don't tell me I'm "still living in my college days"
I have no idea, I usually just project my awkwardness out like a mating call until it draws other awkward members of the opposite sex out from the bushes
Randomize