we got a new version of the plan b at the pharmacy now. its called next choice. you would think they would come up with better names for these things.
What I lack in compassion I make up for in lack of compassion
Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
I just caught myself doing the gator chomp to my tv. I need to get laid.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just threw up in a trash can by the ATM. Then pulled out money for weed.
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
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This is sufficient.
Another night, another sound of my neighbor almost having an orgasm.
And she used to have such long ones. Sad.
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
I got so drunk at the hockey game I bought everyone behind me in concession line a funnel cake.
Right now, there's some ten year old kid getting ready to go outside and play basketball. He will soon find out his basketball hoop was no match for my car.
Swish.
He fucked me so well and hard that the couch slid into the Christmas tree. I had to pull branches out of my hair.
I almost accidentally threw him out a window during sex last night.
Can’t. It’s taco and dick night.
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