Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
Sitting in the library lobby in the middle of exam week. Drunk. Dressed as santas slutty helper. Waiting for the student shuttle service. People are clapping for me as they walk by. Tell me how this isnt college
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
you know something has gone wrong in your life when you've gotten a court order to stay away from ALL mc donalds.
she's my drunk super hero.
I knew his night was already over when he started marking lines on the bottle and setting goals
Someone is gonna learn how to start an IV in the morning
It was like god placed me in his bed and said," here's your shot girl. Don't mess this up." And I looked at god and laughed in his face.
I couldn't get past the raccoon on my porch so i slept on my lawn.
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
All I remember is folk music and a lot of drugs. I am never going "on an adventure" with you again
I'm going to assume that "the army of generous folk dancers" is no longer a goal you are willing to fulfill
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
Randomize
