hell yes lets make some ravioli
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
there was this guy running across campus barefoot in the pouring rain stepping in all the puddles. i want his life. and i want to be stripper.
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
3 things. 1) we need alcohol 2) we need alcohol 3) we need tortilla chips. Let's make a plan. Bro shakes and salsa.
It's hard to be a gentleman when a girl pauses her karaoke version of "a whole new world," and proceeds to tell the entire bar that she wants your cock in her mouth.
He said I went to go sit outside and is promised I wouldn't leave he brings me a chair and I'm gone. He found me stumbling a half mile away in my socks
My mouth feels like I've been chewing on leather and firecrackers for the past 3 days
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
Bro, you're like, my right testicle. Can't go anywhere without you.
someone needs to name a hurricane after you
I am afraid of asking him for his new number so I continue to text the one that's no longer in service.
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
Randomize
