no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
I've got to stop making out with the guys and sharing drinks with you. I'm the reason we all get sick at the same time. Sorry.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
Apparently while trying to get up from vomiting in the toilet I grabbed the seat cover for leverage and smashed my own head between it and the bowl. I don't remember this.
She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
Just got flashed by an entire bus of girls in school uniforms. We then had to wait beside each other at a light. It was awkward.
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
BUT YOU MUST FINISH YOUR QUEST
TO FIND THE HOLY GRAIL
AND GET DRUNK OFF YOUR ASS BY DRINKING OUT OF IT
You must take up my position now. You must pass out in awkward places as I taught you... Sears a hotel elevator and Burger King bathroom. You potential for greater young grasshopper.
I think I pulled a boob muscle during phone sex
This time tomorrow I will be drunk and in a voodoo shop
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
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