at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
Goose bottles do NOT make good bowling pins
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
On second thought, trying to signify she was a butter face by wiping my bagel on her cheek may not have been in my best of interests
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
Someone left me hummas on my door step between the hours of 1am-3am
Ever the responsible adult, I just realized that today is the Obamacare deadline, but I'm too high to handle insurance now.
I had a drinkin contest with a person that didnt exsist, fuck withdrawl day
Hold on are you sure that we dont have another roommate?
Yes.
I currently look like a drunken mermaid, god I love beach parties.
I did cocaine with my cab driver all night. It was the best date.
I made a booty call at 3:30 am on a Monday... I think I just became the ultimate female fuckboy. I don't know whether to be ashamed or get myself a trophy.
i found 4 slices of pizza in my toaster, and a can of unopened soup in my blender.. wtf?
Dude, you ever snap awake on the toilet at work with that panicked, "How long have I been here?!" feeling??
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
Stop trying to get me to choose vodka over a nap
Randomize
