I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
the 24 hour champagne diet aint going so well
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
how many past hook-ups can i invite to go bar hopping with me for my b-day before it becomes a bad idea?
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
I'm sitting on my couch eating a bag of marshmallows and watching someone run bare ass down the street. What has happened to my life?
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
I didn't know White Castle was open when your sober.
I feel like I was playing penis roulette last night nd I landed on the wrong one.
in other news i got caramel vodka poured on me. upside, i smell amazing
So last night, I bought mother's day cards and the Plan B pill.
Hey, remember that time a week ago when we walk-of-shamed literally down the Vegas Strip at 8:45am and I had one broken heel?
Randomize
