I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
I watched her choke out a bouncer with the broken strap from her purse, I think shes the one.
Showerbowl immediately followed by pullups naked. I feel like fucking Tarzan
Let's paint friendship bongs
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
Im glad the only reason we got out of bed today was to get Halloween candy on sale.
Hungover. Have to fix everything I've broken. I'm gonna be very late.
i wish i could tell my students that all of their lessons plans were brought to them by captain morgan and diet coke. it's like seasame street, only for high schoolers being taught by a student teacher.
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
My mom just drunk texted me complaining about her genitals smelling like Taco Bell. I really am her son
I'm starting to think my emotional health is declining because I was watching transformers today and legit almost started crying
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
Don't get mad at me now, you have my car and all the doughnuts
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