just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
I'm gonna put my relationship status as "widowed" to see if it helps me get some poon.
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
Just when you think you're never going to have sex again, BOOM you're naked in bed with a guatemalan
We're doing kegstands for my 80th Bday, so don't lose that muscle tone.
Do you relize what downtown will be like this week? Like open season. But instead of deer its hot baseball players from all over the country that we'll never have to see again. I swear the college world series is a gift from god.
Mitt romney looks like a fantastic lover (full disclorsure: im 76% vodka right now)
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
Remember that one time you told the bartender he was fuckable? Well, he's here.
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
Tell me that I didn't just get ash in my Russian and just mix it TF in bc who cares and life has no meaning.
Randomize
