Using Dr. Seuss quotes to ask me how badly I want your penis is not appropriate.
It took me 3 tries to get up the front steps. They kept me motivated by waving taco bell just out of my reach. Surprisingly effective.
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
First table when you walk in. Can't miss us. I'm wearing a feather boa and a green hat
You had me at first table
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
I made him watch the first 5 episodes of Game of Thrones before I decided to sleep with him.
Going overboard is basically 75% of my personality
I'm a gorgeous hot mess
You were dancing to the Bee Gees, at 3am, with a piece of ham on your head. Moral of the story, You can't drink.
It's not my fault I make her feel like a Taylor Swift album
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
I literally ended up in this basement and was tangoing w my friend and then I peed in a supply closet and had to be put to bed
Randomize
