birth control should be required to get into college
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
stuck in the elevator with that hot guy from the 3rd flood. Worried he can smell my spray tan and desperation
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Basically I learned last night that if you're too polite people will think it's okay to play with your nipples when really its not even a little okay
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
I woke up and he was just feeling up my stomach. I felt like buddha and he was rubbing my belly for good luck. never again.
He pulled a kid having a seizure out of a car and stayed with him until the ambulance came.
he what???
Not kidding. My ovaries cannot handle this shit...swear next time he'll rescue a bunch of pound puppies and hand them out to lonely orphans.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He got punched in the face last night? By who? I’ll invite him to our formal. Seriously.
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
I love you. I would never turn you into a bear.
Oh god I just had an orgasim riding my bike. I need to get laid pronto.
I did not marry a roomba.
Randomize