actually, I'm a sock model
I've been at work for less than an hour and have pooped twice already. That's what happens when you start sleeping with your roommate and don't want to use the bathroom at home anymore.
this girl im hooking up with thought my ring was a purity ring... apparently im taking it too slow
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
Just ordered a clown who does balloon animals. No backing out now.
apparently i walked around all last night forcing people to beer bong whatever drink was in their hand. so far this morning ive had three people refer to me as beer bong man
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
They told you that you couldn't fit in the dryer. Man, did they eat their words. You did brake the door though.
Try to make ecstasy cheese. Capitalize on the molly and greek yogurt trends. MARKETING
YOU MAKE ANAL SEX SOUND LIKE A SPORTING EVENT
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
So i came so hard i almost passed out, where has this vibrator been all my life?
I passed out while searching "symptoms of narcolepsy"...
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