your room smells of hookers.
And success
there's something so ridiculous to me about watching someone with glasses exercising. it's like watching a whore studying in the library. stop trying to be someone you're not.
i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
I'm thinking about wearing a strap-on just to freak him out the next time he pulls my pants off.
Also I stopped in the middle of the road and put my hazards on because BUNNIES WERE PLAYING
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
I just woke up to a ten minute voicemail of you sobbing about the X-Men. Stop getting drunk and watching Marvel movies.
BUT WOLVERINE IS SO TORMENTED AND JUST WANTS TO BE LOVED
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
Did anyone see us fucking last night on the giant turtle outside downtown Disney?
Well obviously we have a ghost in the house who’s taking showers in your bathroom and doing our cocaine.
It started off with wine and ended up with me in only my pearls and heels. It was about the classiest sexual experience I've ever had.
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