you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with
Just showed mom and dad the pics from San Francisco, while i played the Full House theme song in the background.
can you pick up eggs and chocolate sauce on your way home?
what kind of party is this?
the best kind ever
You tried to sled down the middle of the street. In. Your. Coat. Of course you are bruised.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish Samuel L. Jackson would narrate our bar crawls
Shitshow foam night was such a success
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
They flooded the bathroom and their version of cleaning it up was to throw our couch cushions on it. That's when I decided to chug tequila and go drunk bowling. So hitting the kid with my ball is really their fault.
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
We took a walk on the beach after the bar, he held my hand and kissed me. And then I peed under a lifeguard stand. It was so romantic.
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
I walked in on him fucking her whilst she ate skittles. I saw things no one should see, but I did get your bra back. You owe me.
I was puking for like ten minutes when I realized my parents were fucking in the shower and were afraid to come out
I regret nothing
Not even Married Dan?
I regret one thing
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