He just asked me if I ever had the urge to put a zucchini in my ass.
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
so this chick screams out the name doug is bed..not to later do i find out doug is her vibrator
hello competition
new rule: i'm not touching his penis until he takes me out to dinner.
you know, if you actually abided by that rule there would be many more successful restauranteurs in ohio.
Dude, she literally just asked me if her mac'n'cheese makes me horny. I think I found the one.
Single person behavior: I wanted a cookie but was too lazy to make or go buy any, so I let cookie dough ice cream melt and ate all the chunks. Pantsless.
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
All's fair in love and war. and tinder.
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
Life without a bra equals bliss.
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
Randomize
