would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
For a whole 2 minutes you were convinced you were talking to my voicemail
those are the first brownies ive had since i was 13 that didnt have weed in them.
They thought we spoke German and French even though we just kept repeating "I give to you a cat" and "Are you drunk?"
that trick or treat candy bucket that we used to collect beer money last night was very helpful when I vomited in it this morning
What a great world we live in when USPS can tell you that your drugs have been delivered.
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
No im just getting a road beer. You got my pants?
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
I was grossed out that all their candles smelled like vagina and then I remembered where my fingers had been.
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
My night can be summed up in 3 words: Vodka. Threesomes. Hospital.
You're a waste of cheezeits
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
Randomize
