Reasons why i shouldn't be drunk and upset: i'm going to a boy's
we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
Do you think if I puke at the gym they think is because I'm going hard walking on the treadmill?
You kept trying to throw the grocery cart off the balcony.
I was thinking about getting her an edible arrangement for an engagement gift. You want in?
I'm buying her a drink and not telling her to dump his ass. that's my gift.
Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
Last night I was this close to hooking up with someone called "Handjob Pat" dubbed for the time he paid $150 for a handjob in Canada.
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
I tried to get the guy I like to “spit shake” on a sexual bet... why am I such a bro fml
Randomize
