OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class
I spilled a beer on myself, so I went back to my place to change. The city marshall was at my door with a warrant. That beer cost me 760 bucks.
i know, but like... i wanna be a CLASSY i'm-stealing-your-date kind of slutty...
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
I just peed in the Schreyer honors college shrubbery. Thanks honors students, you're finally good for something
What was the name of the cook I had sex with at Famous Dave's?
You got called a pussy at a party with a slow cooker, you can't let that shit slide
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
His birthday is on cinco de mayo and he doesn’t drink or like tacos. What a waste.
Someone's gotta tell him drunk sex comes before dating
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
Randomize
